Saturday, June 27, 2015

Lose every sense of time

If you are going to be tired... be tired like a sloth and relocate yourself to somewhere good. 

I get too excited of living and too scared of the fact that life is passing me by...
And now I'm here. Tired of trying to see, do and be everything. Tired of holding my eyes open and making sure I'm not missing anything inspirational. Tired of sleepless nights when my brain is working in full speed and dreams feel more real than reality. Tired of hoping to make everything work when sometimes things just need to brake down.
So now it's time to rest. Reset. Restart. Take a breath or two and just zone out. Push the snooze button. Have everything in slow motion and put everybody "on silent."
Time to talk less. Listen to more music. And quietness of my thoughts. And dreams.

Inimene on protsess. Ning see teeb inimeseks olemise väga võluvaks. See, et sa pidevalt muutud. 

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Going backwards

When you're about to move on, he pulls you back every time.

How to say "no" when you have never even said a proper "yes"?

I guess we need to figure out the difference how we treat people we like and how we treat someone we like to own. And I guess there's a huge difference.
You'll know it by the way you are interested in not just other person but also other person's business. You'll know it by wanting to know their past and future not just present. You'll know it by the look you give them... not just the look to conquer you. You want to make an effort, not just sell your ideas. You are in the mood of sharing, not hiding away. You will give space, not possess.
You want to be apart because you want to know how it is to miss them. You want to have your own time because you like the moment of seeing them again. You have the power to always come up with weird ideas to do because you two match and your brain functions brighter.
Trust me... if the other person is clever enough, he or she could just tell it by the look of your face: "is there trust or not."
The trust of "is it worth to waste time with you."

Don't fall in love with the moment 
and think you're in love with the girl. 

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Leave yourself speechless

Get used to living.
It might sound strange and silly. It might sound exhausting. But it's worth it.
Be busy. Don't just chat with people. Tell them your stories, plans and ideas. Go do something together. Even if it might not sound like a great life changing plan - but go to have a walk, collect rocks or leaves and have a talk. Talk then and there. Not later via Facebook or iMessages.
Get used to it.
Life is going to be taken away anyways. But so far it's yours. You have the power.

Get used to yourself.
You need to talk to yourself. Find out what do you want.
That doesn't mean in a public place. But oh well, why not! Go to a park and have a conversation with yourself. Sit down. Start talking. And listen.
We always think what we want to be. But please have a chat and find out who you already are. Take some time to... I don't know.... find out what you like. What you like to listen, where would you really like to go or what kind of person shares your vibes. What ever you find out - Make yourself aware of that.
Get used to it.
Let yourself know what's your favourite colour, meal or even breathing pattern. Get to know yourself first, then see if you want to change the amazing person you already are.

Get used to trying.
Don't have high expectations on yourself. You were born with nothing. And you don't know a person unless you talk to them.
But have high standards. That one night out might ruin your work tomorrow. Make sure if you want to go. Stay in... or go and be with the ones who love you and who you adore. Or dump the ones who don't have the same spirit standards as you. Or the ones who always keep hurting you. Or call the one who you really miss - just to let him or her know that you still have them on your mind. Have high standards. It's not your mistake that you sometimes mis-read people. You at least gave them a CHANCE. You are awesome because of that.
Get used to your decisions.
But after finding out the real deal - be connected with your standards and what you deserve.

Be always a bit more. Comparing to yourself, not others. Be more braver, give more chances, take more time to yourself, laugh a bit more with friends. Find always something more that excites you, deserves you or makes you happy. Be a bit more you. Get used to being more. Doing more. Loving and living more.

A boat is always safe in the harbour, but that's not what boats are built for. Be more. 

Tuesday, June 16, 2015


Do you know the feeling of arriving somewhere you have waited for so long? And maybe you don't even know that you have waited for this destination?
Time stops. You breathe. Or you are trying to breathe. Or you finally feel like breathing. You are out of water and every drop falls down on your body so peacefully. Mindfully. You make your lungs blossom with comfort, adventures, laugher and colours. You have the urge to breath more and more. You love the smell of it. The taste of it. The looks of it. You are not thinking about leaving soon even if the reality wants you to. Every minute seems so short yet so full of life.
The way you want to listen to it and the way it listens you is more deeper than usual. You want to take in everything it teaches you and at the same time you want to be able to say all the things that come into your mind. Cause no one is there to judge you. The place accepts you as you are.
It feels like home, but so far away from home. You feel cozy and safe. You feel like you know everything. But everything is nothing when you are not present then and there. You feel like you know the place, every angle of it. At the same time you find it confusing because you never thought that this place could really exist. You think it might be your mind that is messing with you. But trust me, it's not.
It makes you feel even more fearless than before. And by that I don't mean doing unnecessary and reckless decisions. I mean being fearless in your heart, mind and body. Letting someone else take the shots for you.
Only Universe can bring you to a place like that. It just has to happen. You can't decide when, where or how. You let the Universe do its thing. You just have to trust yourself, the situation and your luck. Grab its hand and have a laugh. Look at it and let it change your life a bit. Look at Universe and thank him.

He looked at me like I was magic. And I looked at him like he was even more magical.

// person-through-my-eyes

Sunday, June 14, 2015

Two realities

Do you know the kind of dreams where everything feels so real and absurd that the moment you wake up you find yourself in a little shock or confusion?
Those dreams make you think what if there's more than meets the eye. The absurd chance of living two lives is too bizarre. But what if one life is telling the other what to do, what to expect and what is going on without words.
The dreams I have had for the past few days have been more than real. If I can't see the connection I must be pitch-blind.

Riding on the passenger seat while having car accident could mean you're taking a passive role in life/situation. Having someone in the driver's seat could mean that someone is currently calling the shorts for you. 

There're basically two ways to react towards dreams... in my opinion. You either watch them as movies, get entertained, maybe find inspiration. You go with it. Maybe you soon forgot them.
Or after waking up you could lie in your bed and give it quick think-through. Specially if those dreams are the ones that will keep you distracted. Just give it a few minutes. Feel what your conscious might be saying to you. But definitely find a solution that works for you. Don't get caught up by dreams... they are just your thoughts - maybe a bit more vivid, but it's still you.

In the end of the night you are the one who dreamt those dreams. It's you. Get to know yourself.
At least hopefully it's you.
Cause there's more than meets the eye.

Thursday, June 11, 2015

Kindness matters

I'm not the one who should judge people, places, feelings or situations.
It doesn't mean I'm not having an opinion.
It means the acceptance of human differences.

It's all fun and games until you take the jokes in and start to believe them. Start to put labels on people you were just few seconds ago admiring; start to put negative thoughts in to your head about people who you don't even know.

I know the ones who admit they are getting energy from stealing others, being fake depressed and whining. And I also know the ones who are not admitting it - but clearly they feel it too. Specially if the third thing they say when you meet is something about bad situation but he or she is being the bigger person.
Letting go is a good thing, honey.
I'm not the expert of it. But I always give it a try.

Take few seconds of the day to look around. 
Glance into yourself.
And to the streets of wonder. With amazing vibes. 

Saturday, June 6, 2015

Find your wild

When you have mastered the art of loving yourself and putting yourself first... you realise now you need to start doing things for yourself.

You wake up for yourself. You eat the breakfast you love. You go to school if you are interested in it. You go to work if you need to pay your bills. Hopefully you do something you like to do. Or you learn how to love it. You interact with the ones who bring out the best in you. Or who you can laugh the most, share the most or travel the most. You read the books you love. Or magazines - and no-one is there to judge you. You listen that "shitty" band that your course mates hate because you love them.  You take yourself out to dinner, to movies, to the zoo and to the freaking party because you want to. You start collecting stamps or maps because why not. You save your money instead of floating on your parents wallets because you feel like it. You ask for help if you want to. You share travels with your parents because you love them. You cook the stuff you love. And you share it because love should be shared.

But most of all... Start doing things you were too scared to do because you were not sure of your knowledge, power or abilities. Start photographing, developing business ideas, saving money, writing, singing, painting, being alone, being in love, being out of love, breaking a habit, taking on a new habit, decorating your room, taking swimming lessons. What ever you want to do you better start doing it. I have postponed two of my dreams for a year now. And what I gained from it - yes, some other good memories... but also regrets. Loads of regrets.
And those two little things could have been squeezed in my daily routine. But I just had no courage. And will power. And not in enough wildness in my soul.

Monday, June 1, 2015

The one who got away

Oh well the tables have turned.

I'm the one who got away.
Let me give you a little modest speech.
Life happens when you are making plans. Life happens when you are getting ready to be fearless enough to go to the starting line. Life happens when you are daydreaming about the person you like and not acting towards it. Life happens while you are feeling you are not ready to take a chance. Life happens when you are sitting home and thinking about whats good and bad.

Life happened while you were too uptight to think I'm waiting too.
It happened while you were trying to make up your mind but you were still not fearless enough to finish your sentences and thoughts.
It happened while you were too busy waiting it to happen.

You could collaborate with life if you take the 3 seconds of courage and let go of what you should do and actually do what you want to do.

sakura matata, spring 2015